Haile Rapist Sketch Released

Apparently this is the face of evil -- at least in regards to the rape in Haile Plantation earlier this week.

The rapist is still at large. A delay in the investigative action is partly due to the nature of the victim's injuries; apparently some of her medical treatment has made it difficult for her to work with the police.

The whole thing is just so sad. Hopefully they'll catch him soon. A reward of over $20,000 has been raised by Gainesville residents. It's nice to see a community band together.

Sean Wiggins vs. Dragon Punch

This is a video of Sean Wiggins. Some of you may know this man. Sean is a UFC fighter -- yeah, the stuff on TV where two gentleman are locked into a cage and beat the shit out of each other. Sean has a record of 3-0. What Sean does not have is a victory over the Dragon Punch machine at Gator City.

Sean has many hours logged in the gym honing his craft. We all thought he had what it took to take down the punching machine. Unfortunately he did not.

As you can tell in the video, we had the bar incensed; half of us were sure he would knock the ball clear off its rope. The real cat's ass comes in the moments after his total failure. Note the entire bar booing as Sean disappoints everyone with the lowest score of the evening.

He may be a beloved friend but a powerful puncher, it seems, he is not.

Quote of the Day

"The only questions worth asking today are whether humans are going to have any emotions tomorrow, and what the quality of life will be if the answer is no."

-Lester Bangs

Happy Belated Birthday to Myself

It was my birthday last night and it was alot of fun. Thanks to all who attended at Durty Nelly's last night.

Drinks were drank, fun was had and a new shot was recognized and widely appreciated.

If you've never had a Chocolate Cake shot, do yourself a favor, and try one. I know, I know, I know. It sounds really girly and, believe me, it is a little embarrassing to order. It's worth it though. I'm not shitting you -- it tastes like a chocolate cake. It's the damnedest thing.

Anyways, I am officially an old man now that I have celebrated a birthday past my twenty-first. I am looking wearily towards the eminent hair-loss, health decline and general crankiness that comes with old age.

Quote of the Day

"First they came for the Jews
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me."

-Pastor Martin Niemöller

Listen to This

Listen to this Simon and Garfunkel song and be happy. It reminds me of my childhood.

You've got to give it a try at least through the chorus.

Woman Raped in Haile Plantation This Morning

A woman was raped while jogging, in Haile Plantation, around 6:30 this morning.

She was about 40 feet behind a house while running on one of the many trails that wind through the neighborhood when a black man, with short hair and an average build, stepped out of the bushes brandishing a gun. He struck the 36-year-old woman in the face with the gun and ripped her clothes off. He continued to beat her with the gun, breaking her jaw, and then raped her.

Another jogger heard the woman's screams and came to her aid only to see the man casually walk off and get into a small, dark-colored, four-door sedan. The suspect is still at large and, obviously, very dangerous.

This is just so sad and unfortunate. Hopefully they catch this guy soon and he gets what he has coming to him. Be careful out there; people are sick.

Floyd Mayweather: Making it Rain With Monopoly Money

It seems that Floyd "Money" Mayweather has made a small mistake. Mayweather was in Club Pure in Las Vegas this weekend and was doing his, now world renowned, make it rain routine.

Mayweather, who is never one to down-play his wealth, often throws stacks of 100s around in the club. This weekend however, Floyd was throwing fake money around. We're not talking like "ha ha" fake money with different colors or obviously smaller sizes. We're talking real-deal funny money. The counterfeit, illegal kind.

Some poor college kid picked up a few of the hundreds and was almost arrested the next day for trying to use it to buy gas.

Not cool Floyd. It's one thing to constantly talk about how much money you have, obnoxiously flaunt your jewelry and openly make sports bets for exorbitant amounts of money. It's another story to be doing these, already kind of lame, things while throwing out fake money at the club to feel special.

Grow up Floyd. Even Pacman Jones is laughing at you after this one.

Quote of the Day

"I'm the happiest the saddest guy in the world can be."

-Vincent Gallo

Not Your Typical Reaction to a Tough Loss

This is one of the most ridiculous, profanity-laced tirades I have ever seen. As a die-hard Gator fan I can sympathize with the terrible sting of defeat; when you are a Gator you expect -- and deserve -- to win every game. What I can't relate to is the out of control antics of this little adolescent Gator. The video was shot during UF's game against Auburn and I imagine this kid had an aneurysm shortly after the video cut out.

The Wii Fit is Calling Kids Fat

The Nintendo Wii has a new game called Wii Fit. It is basically a game where you jump around on a platform and through how skilled and proficient at jumping on the platform you are, the game rates your fitness level. You can also enter your age, height and weight and the game gives you your BMI -- body mass index. A ten-year-old girl, apparently, was told she is fat by the game; her parents were not thrilled.

The girl's father said that his daughter wasn't fat she was merely "well built," leading me to believe the child is absolutely humongous. And you know what? Maybe a video game calling our kids fat isn't the best thing in the world -- but it certainly isn't the worst.

We are a fat, video-gaming, television watching, slothful-ass society. American kids are fat. I think letting ourselves slip physically as a society is much worse than a child having their feelings hurt.

In fact, maybe we should have more things that call us fat. Potato chip bags -- you open them and an obnoxious voice says, "Really fat-ass. Think again." Or the T.V. when you click the power on -- "How 'bout a sit-up, waste."

I'm not saying this is a perfect solution, but it's progressive, right? I don't think complete insensitivity is the answer, but I know that coddling and telling everyone their perfect isn't the way to go either. We all have room for improvement and need to be reminded of that from time to time. The Wii knows this and is a step ahead of the curve... no matter how sick its computer sense of humor may be.

Quote of the Day

"These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it."

-Charles Barkley

Boycott Sandwich Board-Using Establishments

I was driving down good ol' Newberry Road this afternoon when I saw something I just can't accept or reconcile with my core beliefs. There was a middle-aged man, looking incredibly miserable and put out, wearing a gigantic sandwich board advertising some bullshit mattress sale or something.

The traffic was heavy, the sun was hot and this poor gentleman was being humiliated. As an employer or member of management you can't make the executive decision to just put the damn sign in the ground? What is the thought process there? I can see some condescending prick of a manager saying, "Yeah Bob, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and put this sign on and go stand in traffic. Yeah I understand you're 45 years old. And yeah, I get it we could just stand the sign up. That's not the point. Are you committed to this team? I mean what the hell are we paying you $6.50 an hour for? In fact, you know what would be even better? Can you go ahead and smile a lot and, you know, kind of wave like an asshole as the cars go by? That'd be great."

I am tired of this fascism and I can't take it anymore. I say this; if there are people calling for us to not go to Beijing for the Olympics and exert our athletic dominance on the rest of the world because China may have some human rights issues, then I am officially calling for the boycott of any establishment utilizing the sandwich board. It's time to stop the humiliation and human rights violations at home.

Oxford Town: Bob Dylan's Tribute to James Meredith

Now, there's no way I can effectively hide my man-love for Bob Dylan, so, every once in a while, to get my fix, I'm going to have to post some Dylan material on here.

This song is called Oxford Town and was written by Dylan about James Meredith's enrollment into the University of Mississippi; Meredith was the first black student enrolled in the school and his acceptance and entry only happened through a direct order from President Kennedy.

There was rioting and beatings leading up to the first day of class as civil-rights workers poured into Oxford and clashed with the cities segregationists and racists.

When the dust cleared many were injured and two of those civil-rights workers were dead. This is Dylan's tribute to the ordeal. It is only 1:50 long, but, in my opinion, it is extremely effective. This is one of my favorite Dylan songs and I think it's a shame that not many people have ever heard it. What may be most impressive is that he was only 21 when he wrote this.